I literally feel your pain. But I have a unique way of handling the dating problem and it’s been extremely effective.
I date as both a man and a women (I’m straight, I just change my sex back and forth). It is about 250 times easier to get a date as a woman (with a man) vs a man (with a women). I calculated it from empirical data.
As man I prefer romance and the old school way of doing things. And living in a major city (San Francisco) this has proven to be a joke to most people. They call me old fashioned and dorky. Yet these same people (mostly women) are lonely themselves and complain about the way guys treat them. Most people here long for romance, yet our social environment (eg Tinder) has brainwashed us into thinking we can quickly find the perfect person — quick hot sex with a good looking Person which buds into romance. They are taking advantage of the fast paced life of this era and screwing everybody. So I’m much alone all the time. As a man.
As a woman, I have the opposite problem! There are so many guys chasing women for some easy, fun NSA sex that I have to stop for times to catch my breath. I also need to ignore many of the guys that are chasing me online, there are just too many. About a third are gross, a third are flakes, and a third work out. But that’s still 250 times better than when I’m a man. And if I wanted romance (i don’t with a man),that would be so easy, I could just choose which guy I wanted to be romantic with. The power of being a woman is incredible. It took me several years getting used to having the power in relationships. And better still, I don’t have to be anything but what I want to be. I don’t have to act a certain way, or dress a certain way. Guys love me for exactly who I am. It’s so lovely.
And when I’m a woman I have a great relationship with women. Their shields are down, so as a sister, I get to touch their female soul without all the bullshit of the strife between the sexes. Something I long for as a man. It’s divine. It’s not romantic sex, but I don’t care. I just love having a connection with women, and I’m take it anyway I can get it. But I never use it to manipulate woman to get into their pants. That’s a big no-no. (But on occasion they make the move…)
The difference between being a man vs a woman is hard to believe. You would need to experience it yourself to understand it. But I think woman have a different problem. At lot of men are dumb assholes (you have to kiss a lot of frogs…) and women might be missing some of the insight i have about how to handle men — eg you don’t ever need to be aloof and rude to manage them. (But I have the luxury of feeling pretty safe). But also the kind of men that love trans girls, and the nature of our relationship is somewhat different…most men have a lot of respect for trans women…I ain’t easy making this change for most trans girls. (It was actually not too hard for me because I live in San Francisco and work in tech, mostly at home).
Nature always finds a ways. I’ve been fortunate, i don’t have to put up with this straight dating crap because I just jump down the bat pole and become a woman. But I wish I could have romance as a man, I prefer it. But I guess maybe our times have killed it. Too bad.
